Tag Archives: relationships

Men vs Women – Hormones – a Transgender Perspective Huffington Post Blog

I wrote this article for hetero-normal couples in hopes that it would give them more insight into their partner’s perspective. Having been male and now transitioning to female, I’ve had the privilege of experiencing both view points and in this case, the affects of hormones on the body.

(Click here to be taken to the article on the Huffington Post Blog.)

Please do not view this as sexist. I am not saying that one sex is better than another. I also am not going into the other genders as this piece is meant for cis-gender people to have an idea of how the other sex lives.

I used scientific data to illustrate commonly known issues in a jovial manner. My assumptions are not scientific of course, but hopefully you can come away from this piece with a simple way of explaining how our hormones affect us differently and a little knowledge of what the other is going through in life. This piece is intended to bring people together.

 – Charlize <3

Cover image credit: Ned Frisk (Getty Images)

The Story Behind Our Last Name and My Cover Photo

When Erin and I were getting married we came to the point about making a decision over our last names. We could leave them alone, we could hyphenate them, or… what? Chose one of the two names?

The whole concept of the name change originally was to instill a sense of family and unfortunately, ownership.

We could not agree with that ideal, so we were stumped.

Then the idea came to us.

Why not chose a new name? One that was just for us. Something to signify our union. We did like the notion of instilling family and what better way to represent our family?

We both love Latin, with Erin having studied it in high school.

We played around with words until we settled on something we could both believe in:

Truth

And so we chose Veritas.

Due to legalities, we’ve only managed to change my name so far and are going to have that retroactively changed on our marriage license, then see if we can use the law to allow her the standard marriage change over.

We’ll see how that pans out.

The picture was taken the day of our wedding. I wanted this shot from the beginning of our planning.

My cousin-in-law had to take it of course since I was in it and I’m ever so grateful and will be always.

Here we are tying the knot. Both figuratively and literally.

We took strips of purple ribbon and attached Velcro at the ends. Placing the ribbon through the rings, we hung them around our necks so that the rings would rest right on our hearts during the ceremony. Then when it came time to exchange the rings, we pulled the ribbon off our neck and let them fall into the other’s hand. We weren’t just exchanging rings or vows, we were exchanging hearts.

We were giving each other our Love.

 – Charlize <3

Cover image credit: Matt Segraves

Coming Out to Your Partner as Transgender – HuffPost Blog

This is my fourth post on the Huffington Post Blog and I wrote it to help illustrate the complexity of coming out as transgender to your partner so that our allies could better understand, but also to remind any transpeople still in the closet that they need to speak their truth. If you love your partner and more importantly yourself, there is no time like now to begin your future.

(Click here to be taken to the article on the Huffington Post Blog.)

I can’t tell you enough how special Erin is. No other partner of mine ever stood up to me and told me straight out, “No. You’re not leaving me.” When she said those words, it stopped me dead in my tracks.

I had never met anyone as stubborn as me or even capable of combating my stubbornness.  I was dumbfounded

I tried several times to break up with her but I couldn’t because truthfully I love her and you can’t hide from the truth.

We laugh about the moment when I finally told her on the bed.

She had been reading a book before we talked through everything till I was assured that she still loved me and would continue to. That’s when she asked if it was ok for her to go back to reading her book.

I, of course, had no objections. I was in my own world, flabbergasted. I kept asking her if this was real. It was hard for me to believe.

But she smiled and kept reading.

Of course it was way more complicated than that, but we like to joke that I told I was transgender and she basically said;

“That’s cool, mind if I go back to reading now?”

Yeah. She’s that awesome and I love her always.

 – Charlize <3

Cover image credit: Shutterstock